What is hate and why did I quickly decide that was what I so badly needed to let go. What did I hate so much that it came to the top of my mind?
And at a professional event nonetheless – was that hate what I felt at work?
Let’s list some of the things that I chose to relate “hate” to:
- I hate repeating myself || I work in a field that requires repeating myself. Every interaction is a new one, new people, new problems. I get that. I do, however, hate repeating myself to people that should know what they are supposed to be doing – peers, seemingly intelligent people who, for a lack of better description, have chosen to forget what we talked about three days ago.
- I hate knowing that today may be just as bad as yesterday || The probability that this would be true is so high that when it isn’t, I celebrate. I let everyone know how appreciative I am that today has been novel in a positive way.
- I hate having no faith in the quality of people || Someone asked me how I get along with people so well. The truth – on a scale of 1 to 10 where 10 is excellent, people start at a 1 and work their way up. I avoid the possibility of failure as I had no faith and expectations and when/if you mess up, I expected it.
But all that type of hate does is alienate – you do all the work and ask for no help cause no one is as good, you offer opinions and take no criticism and as a result you do not grow, you sit and fester and become overwhelmed, depressed and resentful.
I am still working on letting go of that hate!